The induced trauma and impact on mind and body from a sexual addiction can have a devastating impact on your spouse’s physical body. It can affect both her relationship to her body (how she sees or takes care of her…
“We are most vulnerable in our grief and sorrow, yet we will find the courage to discover the truth that sets us free.” Our Reality Ego represents who we are, who we become in different circumstances, what we are,…
“For her, the discovery and disclosure of your actions feels like an explosion with the debris blown in every direction, and she is left not knowing how to put herself and life back together.” In the onset and much…
Trauma Model In her book Your Sexually Addicted Spouse, Dr. Barbara Steffens, a leading expert on healing from sexual betrayal trauma, writes about how many spouses experience symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) soon and shortly after discovery.[1]If left…
An impact letter is what a partner writes within the first week after a formal therapeutic disclosure. She is somewhat still in shock, and yet, she so badly wants to be heard and understood for the trauma and pain she…
Writing a restitution letter to your partner comes within a week of your formal therapeutic disclosure. In this letter, you acknowledge your behaviors and how they have impacted your partner. It is an opportunity to express sincere empathy and remorse…
In the aftermath of discovering a spouse’s sexual secrets and addiction, a partner is traumatized. Most women are blindsided, shocked and lose their sense of reality. She is impacted relationally, emotionally, physically, socially, medically, sexually, spiritually. And as a woman,…
Preparing for a disclosure is a long process. Typically, I plan 3 months out for the preparation needed to have the best outcome possible on disclosure day. It is difficult for the partner to think of waiting another three months…
In the midst of recovery and the healing process, if there is any dribbling or staggering of information, more secrets, it can throw your partner right back into her trauma. And this is why a complete therapeutic disclosure is needed….
First, you may have gotten caught/exposed not of your own will, as in most cases. In those moments, our brains get all “mushy” and we’re in fight, flight, or freeze. In other words, the truth may not all be disclosed….