This journey is for the men who want their lives to be better and stronger, and who want to be in control of their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. The men who are willing to turn themselves inside out must go through the pain that change dictates, putting off the addiction that drives the selfish, prideful, and destructive path.
Becoming: A Guide to Recovery from Sexual Addiction While Helping Your Partner Trust Again is your tool box. In this book, you will discover what it means to turn your life around and make the heart and behavioral changes required for lasting effects. It’s not an overnight quick fix. You choose to be one of the bravehearts who endures for the sake of victory.
Consider the art of Kintsugi, an old Japanese method of repairing broken and shattered pottery bowls with gold and silver. The cracks are filled with precious gold, which adds beauty to the sharp and broken edges. After the repair, the bowl is more beautiful and valuable than before because of the work and value of the repair. This is a beautiful metaphor that posits the beauty of redemption in your life. We can never be beyond restoration and reparation from our brokenness or addictions.
The damaged self needs a refining furnace to remove the impurities of the unwanted behaviors that have hurt you and others along the way. It requires a sincere brokenness and a willingness to do the work of repairing the wreckage in our lives. Becoming “real” requires tolerating discomfort, even when your natural inclination is to quit. By choosing a less traveled path, you break new ground to make way for changes in your life. It’s like taking a jackhammer to a hardened heart and watching it crack, crumble, and dissolve the inner and outer walls of hardness. It’s the idea of rearranging your life to rid yourself of the undesirable behaviors that took control of you and stole the love and peace you once had for yourself and others.
This journey is not for the man who is contemplating his next hit. It’s for the man who makes a choice to put away the old and put on the new. It’s a change of life that not only impacts your process of “Becoming”; it also matters to the people in your life that have been impacted by your choices. You will become the man you know you are and want to be. You will have the integrity to do the right thing for yourself, others, and God.
